No one is truly self-made
My childhood and background is not your stereotypical, big, loving family. I most certainly did not come from money either. My life as a kid was a vicious cycle of poverty and struggles, constantly moving from one small, run-down apartment to another with my mom and sister.
I’ve never been to a family reunion or really have any idea what they entail. A lot of my relatives in New York don’t talk and a lot of them don’t like each other; I, myself, am no exception to this. Character is far more important than blood. If an individual is too toxic, ties often need to be cut, as challenging as it may be at times. Healthy boundaries and good relationships are imperative.
I say this to convey that even though life can be full of adversity, unfair trauma and pain, there is no human being dead or alive that has never been helped by someone. Because of this, I believe that no one is truly self-made.
I had the great privilege of having professor of journalism Janet Blank-Libra’s “Pursuing an ethic of empathy in journalism” class this past J-Term, and it was genuinely one of the best courses I’ve had the honor of experiencing. Blank-Libra taught me that empathy isn’t about agreeing with another individual but more so about understanding them, which is such a beautiful and crucial thing that’s needed for the complexities of this world.
The renowned philosopher Aristotle famously wrote that “humans are rational animals,” and I must agree with him. Even though there is so much evil in the world, it’s important to remember that there is good and bad in everyone. By keeping all this in mind, we can become better at rationalizing, but more importantly by understanding each other empathetically.
It is also quite possible that an abundance of violence and tragedy could be or have been prevented if many more individuals were properly cared for and didn’t have to unfairly go through so much trauma and poor life experiences they didn’t deserve.
I remember how sick to my stomach I felt one day when I received the shocking news that an old friend of mine had been arrested. I was relieved that I had not been in contact with this old friend for a long time and stopped talking to him completely, but I was even more content with the fact that they placed my old friend behind bars for his crime.
However, a peculiar and unexpected thought did cross my mind that I never thought would have entered before ever experiencing something like this. The thought was this: ‘At least I made my old friend laugh plenty of times.’ I remembered the good in him as a human and was compassionate, regardless of agreeing or understanding. Maybe, if he had more of the right people communicating with him in his life, he would not have turned out the way he did and ended up in prison.
While everyone is different, we are also all the same. In communication, hearing the full context of conversations is the only way to fully analyze them and better comprehend. This is how society can build better relationships with one another and not focus so much on differences.
Regardless of how difficult and painful it is at times to exchange words with someone with whom you may not agree on several aspects, everyone needs to talk to each other more. The true irony is that the harder to have conversations should be conducted as well.
No one is self-made because, as human beings, we’re not alone in this world. Even if the help or support one has received is on a higher micro level than macro level, it still exists; even if it’s as simple as someone providing a compliment, holding a door open or giving a hug to someone when they’re sad or had a bad day. Humanity needs more love.
